An open letter to Justin Timberlake

Okay, so I may have shed a tear when N’SYNC broke up. Future Sex/Love Sounds is my favourite album of all-time. And the Justified & Stripped tour is the best concert I’ve ever been to. Needless to say, I’m a huge fan of Justin Timberlake’s music. After N’SYNC broke up in 2002, Justin has become the most successful and relevant member of the group. I mean, does anyone know if Chris Kirkpatrick is still alive? Unlike most boy band alumni, both of Justin’s solo albums have had critical and commercial success. Justin’s second album Future Sex/Love Sounds has sold over ten million copies, earned a Grammy nomination for Album of the Year and was ranked #46 on Rolling Stone magazine’s albums of the decade. How’s hosting The Spelling Bee treating you, Joey?

Long before Lady Gaga made music video’s unnecessarily long, Justin released a short movie for one of his biggest hits, “What Goes Around… Comes Around”. Since the music video was so well-received, I’m starting to believe this is what spawned his subpar acting career:

 

After producing/recording the best album of his career, a little birdie (his Mom?) convinced Justin he was destined to be the next Al Pacino and it’s been downhill ever since. Being a part of a memorable SNL Digital Short doesn’t mean you’ll be battling Leonardo Dicaprio for leading roles, buddy! Since taking a definite hiatus from music, Justin has starred in, The Love Guru, Bad Teacher, Friends With Benefits and The Social Network. Other than The Social Network, did anyone actually like these movies? Don’t get me started how I wasted two hours of my life watching Bad Teacher. His performance in Friends With Benefits can be best described as Acting 101. And I’m still questioning how Paramount Pictures gave The Love Guru the green light. By the way, this is coming from the girl who loved the critically-panned film, Valentine’s Day! I mean, Justin Timberlake’s Rotten Tomatoes page speaks for itself (see here).

Credit where credit is due: Justin does a great job portraying entitled douche Sean Parker in The Social Network. Almost too well.

After starring in one lousy movie after another, I was starting to come to terms with Justin thinking he was the greatest comedic actor of our time. It wasn’t until a few unexpected performances this summer that gave me a glimmer of hope. From The History of Rap with Jimmy Fallon to his impromptu performance in New York City (watch here), I thought this was Justin’s subtle way of telling the world he was planning on recording his third album. To my dismay, the only time Justin has been in the press is promoting his latest mediocre film, In Time. As a result of his “burgeoning” film career, the chances of him recording another album in the near future are slim. All in all, Justin has been a bigger tease this year than I was in High School!

This fan-made video, ironically posted by Justin Timberlake, sums up this entire post:

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